You're middle class -- ACT LIKE IT!

Do you want to help Obama or this dirt bag?







Want to help the economy? Stop acting like a yuppy. Stop leering at and coveting the lifestyles of the rich and famous. Buy a lottery ticket, dream big dreams, but live like your parents did!

Here are a few tips to get you started:


1: Don't lease a car, buy it, and buy American. Keep the price under 25K;


2: Stock up on $6-$8 dollar-a-bottle California wines - the Governator will luv you! And buy American beer!


3: Forget about Nieman Marcus and Nordstrom's -- think Kohl's and K-Mart. Whisk around those racks, you'll be surprised!


4: Learn to cook! A quarter pounder from your kitchen costs less than a dollar and tastes three times better than store-bought. 10 pieces of KFC costs $10 -- two whole chickens cost a little more than half that. Treat yourself to a good restaurant once a month, not twice a week!


5: Buy with cash, and go into the bank to get it. Just the idea of exchanging money with live people will give you an appreciation of its value.


6: SLOW DOWN. Enjoy the day. Take time out to sit someplace outdoors and watch the world. (In Spring now, don't get crazy!)


7: Like to gamble? Only do it with money you could put a match to. Forget the stock market, Vegas or Atlantic City. Go to the horse races! It'll take you a whole day or evening to lose $20, and you'll be getting some fresh air as a bonus. And you have no idea how big and fast and scary horses are until you root one home from the rail!


8: Here's a GREAT, final tip: Forget about 24-7! Shut your consuming down at 6PM. Forgot bread? Feel like an ice cream sundae? You pay extra for that 'convenience'. The world's not coming to an end -- suck it up until tomorrow. Enjoy that quality time with your children or friends.